Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The Age-Old Metaphor

We went to see my Aunt Sandy today. (The link has not been updated in a long time.) She's not doing well at all. And it made me very sad. So sad, that I really can't talk (or type? I can never decide…) about it right now because I've just gotten some semblance of control over myself. Instead, I'm going to talk about something funny that lead to a rather deep (OK, deep might be an exaggeration) thought because that way I can actually sleep tonight. And not use our entire supply of toilet paper as tissues. (Is it just me or do I exaggerate more when I'm trying not to be upset?)

This morning we were leaving our house to go pick up my parents. (Which isn't really true considering my daddy drove after we got there but the point is we went from our house to their house in our car so we could all go to South Texas in our car.) (Which is a whole 'nother story about acquiring 2 new tires for my car. It has 17" rims. Apparently, that's an odd size. And they are the ones that came on the car! On a Sunday, no less, when most tire places are closed. But 5 miles a gallon better than Momma's, we all fit, and it really, REALLY needed new tires anyways so we got it done.) And, in my head, I just had this picture of what would happen if my life were a movie. The scene would suddenly shift from us riding in the car, go back to our house, and dramatically picture, well, something in particular, but it would be way too complicated to explain.

I was already working myself into an upset but desperately trying not to and the whole imagining my life as a movie thing made me laugh. On the inside at least. But later on, I started really thinking about the age-old metaphor of "what if life was really just like making a movie?" And not just because of how sad I am about my Aunt Sandy. That is part of it. But my use of the age-old metaphor wasn't just talking about that. And I suppose it isn't really the age-old metaphor because movies haven't been around that long, but it is a little overused. Trust me; I won't be offended if you stop here. In fact, I won't even know. Big Brother hasn't quite leaked that technology yet.

The main thing I was thinking was that it would be awesome if at certain points in life, you could just yell, "CUT! That was great in theory, but didn't work out in actual execution. REWRITE!" Or "CUT! People just didn't take that the way it was intended. Do it over." Or, my word, just "CUT! 5 minute recess!" (I've been watching JAG, can you tell?) Really, I'd be happy with just the last one. OK, not really, but do you ever feel like you'd like a little 5 minute break where you can step back and not just not think about issues/problems/etc. but for them to actually not exist for 5 minutes just to get your equilibrium back? Maybe it's just me.

And I know I should carry this metaphor all the way through and then God becomes the director and the screenwriter and then there is no "CUT! REWRITE!" because God doesn't make mistakes and really the problem is in free will when we actors start adlibbing and screw it all up without the possibility of a retake.

I'm being a little petulant now and I know it, so I'm going to stop. I don't have to worry about taking care of Aunt Sandy on a daily basis. Kip and Rita do that. I can come back home and get busy and push it away for a while and they can't. And my other little daily problems aren't nearly as taxing as theirs are right now so I know I need to stop and I promise I'm almost done now.

Maybe I'll make it my (non-existant) New Year's Resolution to work on concluding my posts better. I don't have anything profound or that really wraps it up, but I think this will suffice.